A FEW TIPS ON SURVIVING YOUR DIVORCE

A few tips on surviving your divorce.

Divorce is one of the most traumatic experiences one can go through in life. It invokes all kinds of negative feelings such as hurt, betrayal, anger and disappointment to name a few. These feelings are often very hard to control, and they can last a long time. The divorce process is most often, very frustrating and emotionally draining for all parties involved. Due to the high levels of stress and ‘survival mode’ of the parties the ‘what happens next’ part of a divorce is what people seem to neglect. Divorce brings about major changes to nearly every aspect of one’s life, including financial, emotional, mental and domestic instability. One has to re-evaluate and restructure future goals as well as creating and maintaining a new stability in one’s life. Life will be different and it will be hard at first, but adapting to and accepting the changes will help you to get back on your feet.
One would have to restructure their income and expenses for the ‘new household’ paying careful mind to the cost of the children (if there are children). Maintenance will need to be discussed and agreed upon as amicably as possible for the sake of the children. The responsibilities are massive for both parties involved and this responsibility is heightened if there are children in the marriage.
As with most major life events it is a good idea to have a clear road map of where you intend on arriving at the end of this journey.SOME POINTERS TO CONSIDER ON YOUR POST DIVORCE JOURNEY

  1. GET ORGANIZED
  2. SEEK COUNSELING FOR YOURSELF AND YOUR CHILDREN (IF NECESSARY).
  3. FIND STABILITY IN YOUR LIFE
  4. DRAFT A NEW WILL
  5. CHANGE YOUR POLICY BENEFICIARIES
  6. FIND TIME FOR YOURSELF AND ALLOW YOURSELF TO HEAL
  7. INVEST WISELY FOR YOUR FUTURE AND THAT OF YOUR CHILDREN
  8. WORK OUT A MONTHLY BUDGET AND STICK TO IT
  9. MANAGE YOUR DEBT
  10. SECURE YOUR MAINTENANCE AND ENSURE YOUR CHILDREN ARE PROTECTED IN THE UNFORTUNATE EVENT OF MAINTENANCE PAYERS DEATH.
  11. CHANGE YOUR MARITAL STATUS AND SURNAME (IF DESIRED)

When children are involved in a divorce, the parents often dread having to deal with each other post divorce, however one can take heed to the fact that once the pressure cooker of the split is over and settled, the two parents often become amicable with each other (even if just for the children’s sake)
So rest assured that as one door closes; another one opens. You get to choose how you want to  spend the rest of your life. Empower yourself to say “Yes!” to all that presents itself to you, and step through that door. You have survived!  Tread along your new journey gladly, armed with the lessons you’ve learned. And be good to yourself.

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